Highworth Town Football Club has flattened its famously sloping pitch at The Elms Recreation Ground, removing around 12,000 tonnes of soil so the team can play on level ground for the first time. The pitch, near Swindon, was lowered as well as levelled, and was ready for the opening match of the season on Saturday, when Highworth beat Cribbs 1-0.
A committee member called it an enormous change, while admitting the old ground had grown tired, with fences coming down and floodlights that no longer worked. The slope had become club folklore: tactics were built around it, and the club even owned a greyhound named after its favourite move, Hit the Bank. The town mayor said the new facility would be a great asset for the area.
The slope itself has not been so lucky. Having spent decades handing Highworth a vital advantage in the second half, the gradient was carted away by lorry and is now believed to be sitting in a field off the A361, wondering what it did wrong.
"It's not right," said Brenda Pask, 72, of Old Town, who has lived there since before it was old. "That slope was there before any of us. Ron said it was the only thing in Highworth that knew which way it was going. Now it's flat. Like lemonade left out."
Players are said to be struggling to adjust. Wingers who spent years chasing a ball that slowed obligingly on the way uphill now find it rolling at the same speed in every direction, which one supporter described as frankly unsettling. Coaching staff reportedly spent Saturday morning placing a spirit level on the centre spot and staring at it in silence.
A club insider confirmed there were no plans to bring the slope back, but said a small mound had been kept behind the clubhouse for sentimental reasons, where it is visited on match days.
Gary Tench, Area Manager at Tench Paper Solutions in Westlea, said he understood the pain of change. "When we switched to recycled A4, people cried. Actual tears. I got everyone round the photocopier and played them a song I wrote, called Level Playing Field," he said. "It's about fairness, and the pitch at Highworth, and slightly about a woman I met at a pub quiz. The bridge goes uphill. Then it doesn't. That's the journey."
Brenda was unmoved. "He sang it in the Co-op," she said. "I'm not one to gossip, but the manager turned the freezers up to drown him out."
Hit the Bank, the greyhound, is understood to be adjusting to life on the flat. Sources close to the dog say it now simply runs in a straight line, which, given its name, it regards as a personal insult. It declined to comment.